why should I trust?
by edwinelric
Summary: She's had a rough past...Its hard to trust anyone anymore.. Especially men.. Why should she trust people? Will he remember her? (not sure if I wanna do a pairing yet...) O.C.
1. Chapter 1

1903 (8 years old)

Sarah… That's my name… such a weak name…

"A weak name for a weak girl…." That's what my father, Hoenhiem told me the day before he left… taking his anger and psychotic abusiveness with him. I thought things might get better after he left…. Mom would stop crying, I would no longer be some ones personal sex toy, Al and Ed wouldn't have to grow up knowing that monster… I should have known… My life will always be Hell…..

1905 (10 years old)

"Master Alphonse? Master Edward?" I call out to the sleeping five and six year old. Alphonse merely grunts at my call, while Edward continues to snore. I gently shake them. "Al… Ed" I still get little response from my baby brothers. After many gentle attempts, I finally grab Al's favorite Alchemy book and smack him with it. Then a glass of cold milk and poor it on Ed. Al's golden brown head jolts up and rubs his eyes with his little fist, while Edward sputters and flails. One glares and the other gave me puply eyes.

"Five more minutes please?" Al asks using his puppy dog eyes.

"Sorry, last time I did your mother wouldn't stop lecturing me." I said with a rare, but gentle smile, keeping my voice soft and sweet. Alphonse didn't argue after that. He and Ed knew good and well what Mistress Elric's lectures were like.

"Alphonse, Edward, are you up yet?" Mistress Elric walked in. "Oh, Sarah I didn't know you had come to wake them already."

"Yes mistress Elric, am I still needed here?" I ask, slightly bowing. Not letting even a smile appear on my face.

"No, you may go." I bow again and take my leave of the room to make breakfast. After saying good bye to Alphonse before he walked to school, I put on a white apron over my maid dress and I started doing the dishes. When I was halfway through Mistress Trisha came in and started rinsing and drying for me.

Then Hell's Gates opened.


	2. Chapter 2

**1910 (15 years old)**

The night sky is ablaze with fire and gunshots.. I hear the sound of Ishvalaans screaming in terror as the lights of transmutations go off in the distance. Soldiers shout out where to go or who to kill while I pick my way through the sandy ground that is littered with corpses and rubble. Both shadows of the ishvalaans and soldiers dance along the city walls. I hear the sounds of children crying... or are they screaming? I cant tell and as cruel as it may seem; I don't care.I run naked and barefoot through the dessert city. My two goldden, bloodshot eyes tear as smoke and matted golden hair drop into my face.

My body is only running on adrenilane and fear as I trip over a burned corpse. My skinned scarred all over from four, long years of terror. I look up to see him,the monster that my bastard 'father' sold my body to. I hide in a crumbling building and am almost spotted by him...

I peek my head around the broken building... He no longer stands on the roof, but on the ground heading in my general direction. Panic starts to settle in my stomach as I run out a dfferent door, straight towards an Ishvalaan massacre...

I barely dodge the flame that comes from nowhere, killing two Ishvalaan men. A woman in the distance screams a name, but is soon consumed with the flames. I attempt to swallow but to no avail. Not sure which way to go, I turn left to run and slam into a rough blue fabric.

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**Ok I'm ending the chapter here. Im so sorry for never updating! Stay tuned for the next chapter! This is not gender bent Ed...**


	3. Chapter 3

I jerk away from the navy blue fabric. I feel two gloved hands grab my trembling wrists. Is it just me or do the gloves feel more like steel than cotton? My wide golden eyes look to face of the person who has stopped me. I'm startled to see a face mabye four or five years older. His coal black hair, covered in sweat and ash,was cut in a short millitary style. His black orbs once set in hard coldness now slightly startled to see an Amestrian civilian in a war zone.

I try to pull away before he could see the branding on my shoulder. Which meant I belonged to the man who took away my humanity. I give the soldier a good kick in the shin and yank away.

"Wait!" The soldie'rs deep voice callsout, but I continue to run. I manage to slip into an allyway before my former...master... apeared from the shambled building that I just left. I can barely make out the sounds of arguing and the sound of transmutations as I turn the corner, into the open, dessert air. I've finaly made it outside the city of Ishval.

I keep running into the dessert hoping to put as much distance between me and Ishval as possible. Without turning around, I can see the city ablazed with fire, screams, and destruction. The sounds of Hell slowly fade away as I continue running.

After some time I slow to a stop giving my... below the average fifteen year old... body a moments rest. I'm aware of the freezing tempature around me., but I dont feel it... My eyes scan the sandy emptiness around desert is so peacful compared to what I just left behind me.

Before I continue running golden orbs look down at my slightly swollen stomach. This was going to be a long way back...

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**Alright guys. Im so sorry for the sudden change in story! (Reread chapter one.) I had a sudden stroke of inspiration and I needed a way to line the story up right.**


	4. Chapter 4(slightl angsti think,)

_**Warning! Mention of torture and suffering and non kid stuff! DEFINETLY NOT recommended for KIDS! **_

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_**FlashBacK**_

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**December,1906**

**Location- Unkown, possibly underground**

**Age- 11 years old**

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I lean my sweaty head against the, cool, stone wall. The room is already humid like a sauna, making it hard to breathe, the smells of stale human waste and blood what could be considered breathable air...

The chains that keep me in a slightly bent position, have cut into my wrists and ankles. My body yearns to stand up straight. In this dimly lit room I try to keep from losing my mind. Tears threaten to pop up and I refuse to let them fall.

This is all part of his game. He keeps his new toys in this room for hours at a time, with only a few moments of fresh air. (At least that's what he told me.. so far I'm the only toy.) Although, I may not get another breath of fresh air for awhile after I kicked my "Master" in the balls. That earned me a painfull whipping on my back.

Hours or mabye minutes passed before. The only door to the room opened. It Bastardo 1 who had opened it. He was maybe early twenties and a well built Ishvalan. I was "ordered" to call him. Marste... I told them go to hell bastards.

"Ah, Bastardo 1 so nice of you to join me in this corner of heaven." I spoke hoarsly. They dont pride on keeping toys properly hydrated..,..

Bastardo slapped me in the back of the head rather roughly. "The worst is yet to come you little rat."

**Then the Hellstorm came...**

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**End of flashback**

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**Date- May 3, 1911**

**Location- Pinajko's House**

**Age- 16**

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I jolt up from the bed, covered in cold sweat. My heart pounds while look out the window to see lighting strike a tree in the distance, then thunder rumbles in the distance a second later. My breathe is still heavy when I half slide, half jump out of the bed. Staring wirndow, I try to lose my self in the storm. A battle rages between the storm and the images that the night mare resurfaced.

After a few minutes of struggle, the bile churdning in my stomach wins. I run to the bathroom stright by my bedroom door. I feel like someone took my insides, ripped them out, turned them inside out, and shoved them back into my body, only then too have. Them dragged up my throat.

I must have forgot to shut the door or my wretching was really loud because as soon as the toilet was flushed Winry walked in.


End file.
